Save Me From Myself
by Westerosi86
Summary: After freshman year at Yale goes awry, Quinn transfers to NYU to avoid her problems. She ends up being saved by the last person she expected. College Faberry with a side helping of Brittana.
1. Chapter 1

Timeline: This is canon through "On My Way" for the most part. I will include some things that are canon in the back 8 episodes. Quinn still went to Yale, Rachel went to NYADA. Kurt was important for my story so he also got into NYADA. Brittany and Santana are also involved because things are just more fun with them.

A/N: I tried to research things as decently as possible for writing this. Places mentioned by name are real as are most of their locations (except of course for NYADA which I have place in the East Village/Lower East Side area) . I have only been to NYC twice, but did my best in combining what I know with looking things up.

* * *

Her mom had dropped her off and after a cursory goodbye left Quinn alone. It was still very much a fractured relationship and the transfer to NYU had only widened the gap. She told her mom she wasn't happy at Yale. It was true in some form when she told her, even though she had loved most of her freshman year there. It didn't matter why Quinn was transferring, it was a gigantic disappointment to her mother. Fabray's didn't give up like that. If Quinn were to point out that clearly they did, I mean look at her parent's marriage for example, well let's just say that conversation wasn't even worth her time.

Quinn wasn't quitting, she was doing what she always did, what she needed to do…to survive. It was with that knowledge that she arrived at her dorm and felt the extreme disappointment at her entire situation. She was used to life not necessarily being fair to her. She had overcome the pregnancy, the break-ups, her parents, the car crash, everything. It seemed like she finally had her ticket to a better life with Yale. And now that was just another disappointment on her long list. Still, it was hard to act like she still didn't have a lot going for her, but that didn't make it easy.

She had the entire summer to get used to the feeling that she was now going to be a student at NYU. Sure, it wasn't Yale, but it wasn't exactly some dumpy school in Ohio and she should feel proud of that. She walked through the front doors of Brittany Hall and up to her third floor room, room #314 the future home of Quinn Fabray and Mallory Jacobs. It was livable, nice and quaint even, but it wasn't Yale.

Quinn had requested to be put in the first year dorm even though technically it was her sophomore year at college. She hoped that would make it easier to distance herself from people. It was something she had adopted later in high school, an attitude that did a much better job of pushing people away then attracting them. She felt she had shed that mentality going to Yale. She made friends and her life was finally what it was always supposed to be…until it wasn't.

It was time for a new approach. Clearly college wasn't the answer to all her problems, so she was going to tough out the next 4 years with a new vision. It was a certainty in her mind that everything would get better once school was over altogether. Then again, being a high school teacher meant school would never be over. It was a contradiction, it didn't make any sense, yet to Quinn, it made perfect sense. It was the type of thing that felt right…a feeling she wasn't sure she had had since putting on her first Cheerio's uniform freshman year.

Still, it was the contradiction that showed her she was still lost. Somehow she knew it was the right path, but she couldn't explain why for the life of her. Nor did she have any idea where it would get her.

She put her bags on the bed and began unpacking. Another college, another year, another chance. Nothing had felt quite so right and quite so wrong at the same time. So maybe that was a lie. Nothing would ever feel as wrong and right as giving up your baby girl. In seemed like in the scheme of things, this shouldn't be a big deal, but it was. Quinn Fabray hated feeling like she made wrong choices in life. The worst part was that it was a feeling she was starting to get used to.

She finished unpacking her things and decided it was time to see what this new world just might offer her.

####

Quinn decided to take a walk around outside her dorm. Okay, so maybe it shouldn't be a revelation, but it still seemed like one: this was certainly not Yale. This was a campus squeezed into a city if you could even call it a campus. New Haven took on the life of Yale, it was hard to even imagine New Haven without Yale. New York City, on the other hand, well people would hardly notice if you removed NYU from it's landscape.

Then again, when you are trying to put Yale behind you, maybe that is not such a bad thing. It was easy to separate those two experiences already and not getting confused would go a long way for Quinn. There was still something about it though that just didn't mesh with how Quinn viewed her college experience. She prayed that this wasn't another decision she would live to regret.

After a quick walk she decided it was time to return to her dorm room. She couldn't say she was exactly yearning to meet her roommate, as much as it was something she just wanted to get over with. Before freshman year, Quinn had talked with her roommate and gotten to know the girl. Yet, all that couldn't account for the fact that they quickly drifted apart at Yale. They had gotten along well enough, but that mostly involved staying out of each other's ways. It wasn't how she imagined her relationship with her college roommate. She had expected the fairytale as usual, and as always it didn't turn out that way. No BFFs, not even close friends, just another disappointment.

Quinn had originally viewed this as another opportunity for her dream roommate. She had e-mailed Mallory when they had been assigned to room together. She got one quick response, the girl seemed excited to meet Quinn, but was going to be traveling all summer and they would have to wait until school to really get to know each other. Quinn wasn't sure why it struck a nerve, but it just seemed to make her prepare for another let down.

Her roommate was busy unpacking when Quinn finally returned to her dorm room. It only took one look for Quinn to finally appreciate how Rachel had always felt at school. Mallory had to be close to 6 feet tall and made Quinn feel like a dwarf or midget or whatever other crude nicknames Santana had used. Still, despite her height, Quinn noticed that the girl was actually quite pretty. She had wavy brown hair and a slender figure with a face that was quite striking. It was kind of an ethereal beauty and with her height came a pair of legs that Quinn would kill for. She felt that it was quite unfair to be wearing shorts like that when meeting people for the first time.

Quinn knew she was pretty. Still, she couldn't help the feeling looking at her roommate that she was somehow insufficient.

The girl finally noticed Quinn awkwardly standing near the door and turned around.

"Oh!" the girl squeaked out in a timid voice "you must be my roommate. I'm Mallory."

They each reached out their hands for the cliched roommate handshake. "Quinn, it's nice to finally meet you." The girl seemed friendly enough. Her voice didn't carry any type of command or power that gave Quinn the impression of superiority.

"So Quinn, what's your story?" Mallory asked casually as she continued unpacking her boxes.

Quinn found the question mildly hilarious. _Do you have a few hours _might have been a slightly honest but inappropriate response. If there was one thing she wasn't ready to tell her new roommate it was anything resembling her real story.

"Um, well I'm from a small town in Ohio called Lima; it's not really near anything you'd have heard of, unless you're from Ohio too?" Quinn responded. That worked right? It was a surface level cover-up of everything that lay beneath. It was boring and routine, but it was the only part of her Quinn was willing to give to Mallory right now.

"No, not at all, I'm from the Chicago area."

"So are you as excited about college as I am?" Mallory added.

Quinn chuckled at the girls' withdrawn excitement; it was hard to tell if she actually meant it. She quickly realized Mallory had a way about her that reminded her of Brittany in some unexplainable fashion. Quinn figured people could easily mistake Mallory for withdrawn and aloof or maybe even dumb. Yet, the girl was attending NYU, so clearly there was more than meets the eye. It wasn't in the words the girl said, just the nature of the way she carried herself.

"This is actually my sophomore year, I was at Yale for my freshman year, but transferred here this year," Quinn said. Already Quinn felt like she was giving more than she wanted. This was a statement that opened questions, and they were one's Quinn wasn't prepared to answer.

"Ah, it must have been grueling there?"

"It was, but I loved that about it. Honestly….I couldn't afford the tuition anymore and NYU offered me a partial scholarship, so I moved down here." Quinn knew this was a question she would have to field, but it still made her ache a little. It was another lie, one that wouldn't work with her mother, but felt more prudent around friends. Saying she wasn't happy there would open up more questions, but money issues…that was self-explanatory.

"Bummer….well I guess Yale's loss is my gain. Anyway Quinn, I told a friend I would meet her in a few minutes so I have to get going. It was great meeting you though!"

"Alright, see you later Mallory." It was a first step, but Quinn felt like maybe this wasn't going to be so hard after all. It was still a long way from fairytale, but she could get on-board with being friends with Mallory.

####

The first couple weeks of classes were going well for Quinn. Honestly, while they weren't easy, this was almost a cake walk compared to Yale. She had too much free time. She thought about getting a job to pass the time. Even though money wasn't as much an issue anymore, it certainly couldn't hurt to make some.

Truthfully, she was beginning to enjoy herself at NYU. It still wasn't Yale, it would never be Yale, but she loved what she was studying and people had mostly kept to themselves. It was a sad turn of events that 'leaving Quinn Fabray alone' was towards the top of her list of admirable qualities in people.

It was a Saturday night and Mallory was getting ready to go out as her phone rang. Santana's name came up on the caller ID. It was nothing against Santana, but Quinn felt no desire to answer the phone. It was a simple process: Santana was calling her, it was Saturday night, they both now attended school in the same city. The conclusion was even simpler: Santana was calling to invite her out. It was something she had no desire to do. In fact it was something she had a strong desire not to do.

"Go for Q."

"Quinn, get your loser ass out of bed and come out with me tonight," Santana said.

"Stop assuming I'm always in bed Santana. I'm sorry, I can't make it. I have too much work to do." The lies were beginning to pile up, but Quinn explained it away as self-preservation.

"Well you're in bed every fucking time I call you Quinn. I swear, next week I am doing your homework for you so you can come out. Remember, I'm the only one at an Ivy now and I still find the time to enjoy myself."

Unfortunately Quinn knew Santana's threat was legitimate. She masked it behind her dry sarcasm, but the girl was a good friend who would literally go out of her way if it meant Quinn might have a good time. If only Santana realized that doing that would be the opposite of a good time.

"Sure Santana, no point in arguing with you." Honestly, was it ever worth arguing with Santana? You were just asking for a strong serving of denial or a plate full of insults.

"Damn right Blondie. Well have a good one and work ahead so you can actually do something next week."

"Pleasure talking to you too Satan…a."

Quinn snapped shut the phone and flicked it to the end of her bed. Yeah, so she was in her bed reading, and it might not have exactly been a class related book. Quinn glanced over to Mallory who was finishing up getting ready. When their eyes connected, Mallory's did a fantastic roll that reminded her of Santana.

"What?"

"C'mon Quinn, we both know you finished all your homework yesterday. College is supposed to be about having a good time and I honestly don't think you are enjoying yourself. So like, why don't you ever go out?"

"I go out," Quinn responded weakly. She knew she wasn't going to win this argument. But seriously, this girl knew her all of two weeks and was claiming she wasn't enjoying herself. It might have been mildly true, especially on the weekends, but was this really her place?

"Going to the library doesn't count. Seriously, what's the issue? I'm just curious; I'm not like trying to make fun of you," Mallory asked.

"Look Mallory, you're a fine roommate and all, but if I make up a lie to my best friend, what makes you think I'm going to tell you? So just go and enjoy yourself before I start hating myself more than I already do."

Mallory had that deer in headlights look that she did so well. Quinn knew she was being a bitch, but she didn't know what else to do…not about this. Mallory barely knew her, and she should forgive her for that. Nonetheless, you just didn't push Quinn Fabray to give answers.

It didn't take long for Mallory to make her way out of the dorm room. "Have fun with your _homework,_" she added as she shut the door. And just like that a side helping of guilt was added to her plate.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I think I forgot this in Ch1 but shockingly I am not Ryan Murphy, nor do I own Glee or these characters.

A/N: Just a few quick notes

1. I decided to add another chapter today in honor of it being College Day for Faberry Week. I am about 11 chapters into the story, I hope to post 1-2 a week.

2. Thank you so much for the reviews! Hope you continue to enjoy.

3. I began writing this right around On My Way and thus made some choices that now clash with canon. First of all as you will see Quinn and Rachel did not really stay in touch/get as close as on the show. Secondly, Rachel and Finn are still together and Finn decided to logically work/eventually take over the tire shop rather than join the army.

* * *

It was a week later when her phone rang again. This time it was Brittany.

"Hey Quinn, I'm outside my dorm. How do I get inside?" the tender voice she had missed rang through her ear.

"Brittany, you mean my dorm right?" Quinn hoped she was actually at the right place, but you could never tell with Brittany.

"Yeah, my dorm, it has my name on it, so it's mine."

Quinn immediately started laughing and couldn't really control herself. Who would have thought living in Brittany Hall could cause so much trouble. She really should have seen this coming.

"Did someone tell a joke Quinn?" said the confused voice on the phone.

"Yeah…on the TV," she lied half-heartedly knowing that Brittany didn't appreciate people laughing at her expense. "See that panel on the right, you can buzz my room number, 314 and I can let you in."

Quinn really hoped Brittany could figure it out; she was in lazy mode and didn't want to trudge down to the front door right now. After a minute of hearing some beeping, but no buzz she knew it was hopeless. She started moving her way towards the front door.

"Quinn! This thing makes like no sense!" Brittany cried out.

"No worries Britt, I'm on my way." She hung up the phone and quickly made her way down to the front door.

A big hug and a few minutes later they were back up at her room. She quickly introduced Brittany to Mallory who was busy concentrating on homework before she went out for the night.

Quinn looked at Brittany and could see not much had changed on the outside. She still wondered how she was doing mentally. After things got rough with Santana last year, Brittany was calling her nearly every day for a month. Shortly after, Quinn ran into her own issues and had to start ignoring Brittany's phone calls. It was not something she was particularly proud of, but Quinn always seemed to put herself first.

It had been almost four months of not talking when Quinn finally managed the courage to tell Brittany she was transferring to NYU. It was at that point that Quinn thanked her lucky stars for Brittany. Despite being a bitch and ignoring her for so long, Brittany just squealed in delight and suddenly it was like none of it had ever happened. Quinn wouldn't have blamed her for a second if she had yelled at her or ignored her in return, but this was Brittany. The girl had handled both Santana and Quinn for years without flinching; she deserved a medal for that. Unfortunately, Santana was a different story now.

"So Britt, you wanna watch Gilmore Girls or Gossip Girl tonight?" Quinn figured throwing two of Brittany's favorite shows out there might satisfy the girl. So they weren't exactly the height of impeccable art, but Quinn got a mild amount of entertainment out of them and they were a throwback to high school when Britt would force Quinn and Santana to watch them.

"Quinn, there were way too many Gs in that sentence for me. I thought we were gonna go out?" Britt responded confused.

Quinn shuddered at the prospect of going out. It became a game of weighing her options very quickly. Obviously explaining her complete non-desire to go out was off the table. That pretty much left badgering Brittany into staying in for the night or sucking it up and going out.

"I thought we could just stay in and catch up?" Quinn said, looking for a good reason to keep Brittany from making her go out.

"Lame! We can totally catch up and go out. I promise there will be some cool people there. Did you not go out at Yale?"

Quinn noticed Britt looked almost hurt at the idea of not going out. She had approached this situation thinking there was no way she was going out, but she quickly realized even if she kept them in tonight, it would never work for the long-term. Her selfishness had almost thrown this friendship away once and she realized she had too few friends to risk doing that again. At least she would have a friend she could trust at her side to get her through this.

"Alright, you win, where are we going?" Quinn finally gave in. She noticed Mallory perk up at her desk, but the girl continued working. To be honest, they hadn't really talked much since their spat a week ago.

"YES!" Brittany exploded, "This little bar in SoHo. I don't really know how to get there though. I probably should have thought about that before I asked you," she said, suddenly looking like she was about to cry.

"No problem," Quinn said quickly grabbing her iPhone, "what's it called?"

Luckily Brittany had at least saved the text that had the name of the bar, since she couldn't remember that either. It took Quinn a little while to get dressed. She tried to look as unappealing as possible, putting on a hoodie and some jeans, but Brittany just wouldn't let that fly. Brittany attempted to get her to put on this little black dress she had bought the summer before Yale. Quinn knew that would attract just the kind of attention she was looking to avoid. After some haggling Brittany finally acquiesced to a yellow summer dress and a white cardigan.

####

The two girls headed down to the metro stop near their dorm and only had to take it one stop south to get to the SoHo area. Quinn was using her iPhone the rest of the way to navigate them to the bar.

"So have you talked to Santana recently?" Brittany squeaked out, looking literally on the verge of tears just from mentioning the girl's name.

"Here and there, what about you?" Quinn responded and instantly knew it was the wrong thing to say. Even though she had lost touch with Brittany for a while, her and Santana had managed to keep in touch. It was funny to Quinn that this was more due to the fact that her and Santana talked about once a month. It meant that ignoring one phone call didn't have the potential to ruin the friendship the way ignoring Brittany for a month did. Once she told Santana about transferring they had begun to talk more often.

"We don't really talk anymore…is she…is she okay?"

Quinn was not sure how to respond to that. Sure, Santana sounded fine when they talked, but admitting that would probably make Brittany feel even worse. Actually, knowing Britt she would probably like to know Santana was doing well. It was a lose-lose situation, so Quinn decided to veer towards the middle ground.

"You know Santana…she doesn't really talk about her feelings. Are you ever going to tell me what happened between you two?" The truth was that even though Brittany had spent almost an hour every day for a month pining over Santana on the phone to Quinn, she had never really explained what happened.

"Maybe when you tell me why you didn't want to go out tonight" Brittany said.

And there it was, that oh so observant Brittany that seemed to come out when you least wanted or expected her to; the one that always made you wonder if she was really as gullible as she seemed. Quinn stopped slightly at the knife she felt was stuck in her side at the simple observation.

"Fair enough," she said simply, "let's just get drunk and forget about all that."

Brittany gave her a side hug that said it was forgotten. The truth of the matter was that Quinn had absolute zero plans to drink tonight. In fact, she hadn't had a drop to drink in almost six months.

####

The two girls had no issues getting past the bouncer with their fake IDs and charming smiles. They entered the building and headed over to the bar so Brittany could get a drink. The place was your typical bar with a nice dance floor and some booths. Just past the bar was a wall with a decent sized arched doorway that led into another area with some more seating. Quinn scanned the crowd and noticed they were mostly college aged students. It was still early so the place was only mildly crowded.

"Quinn, what do you want?"

"I'm just going to take it easy tonight," Quinn said in a sharp way that made Brittany understand it wasn't up for discussion. Luckily the issue wasn't pressed; Quinn had no desire to come up with an excuse why she wasn't drinking.

It was as Brittany was getting a drink that the first guy approached her.

"I'm sorry, but that dress should really be illegal," the guy said with a smirk on his face.

Okay, so he was decently handsome and that pick-up line was certainly better than so many others she had heard at Yale, but no, this was so not happening…already. Quinn was shaking and felt incredibly vulnerable. Brittany was off to the side getting a drink and she felt alone. She quickly realized she was not ready for this at all.

"Hello?" the guy added after Quinn hadn't responded. Any words that came to her mind quickly died on the tip of her tongue.

"She's not interested."

The voice was like magic as Brittany swooped in and saved her. She had never been so grateful. Brittany quickly grabbed her by the arm and led her away from the guy. Quinn felt her heart stop racing.

As they were walking over to the back part of the bar Quinn was struck by what she thought was a brilliant idea.

"Brittany," she said grabbing the blonde's skinny arm and spinning her so they were face-to-face. "Would you pretend to be my girlfriend tonight? I just don't really feel like getting hit on by any more guys."

Brittany looked confused, but simply said, "sure". Before Quinn could start walking again Brittany leaned in and planted a soft kiss on her lips. Quinn was so shocked she couldn't respond one way or the other. Brittany deepened the kiss pressing harder into Quinn's lips before brushing her tongue against her lips then finally pulling her head back.

Quinn was sure she had her own version of deer in headlights painted all over her face.

"Britt…what was that?" Quinn finally managed.

"That's what girlfriends do Quinn. Besides, I've always wanted to kiss you. You taste good…like candy."

Quinn felt she had way too much information to process. She had just had a girl kiss her for the first time and it had been one of her best friends. Not only that, Brittany had just admitted to wanting to kiss her and that her lips tasted good. Quinn didn't know what to think. Most confusing of all was the fact that she kind of liked it.

"Let's go," Brittany said, linking their hands before she could puzzle over this situation even more.

It was as they crossed under an arch into the back section of the bar that Quinn saw them. She immediately jerked both of them to a halt.

"Britt," she hissed, "WHAT is Rachel Berry doing here?" Sure they had kind of got over their issues senior year and sort of become friends, but that hadn't lasted very long. By the end of the school year they were both very busy preparing for their respective colleges and Rachel had left early for a workshop in New York. They hadn't even seen each other in over a year, not since Santana's graduation party. Quinn had no desire to face this shadow on her past. Kurt wasn't really much of a thought, though he certainly didn't help her to forget the fact that Brittany just kissed her.

"Quinn, I told you cool people would be here. Stop acting like you're still in high school."

While Brittany was scolding her for her attitude, she saw Rachel and Kurt notice them across the room. Suddenly they were waving at them like a couple of crazy people. She could be told not to act like she's still in high school all Brittany wanted, but the bottom line was that nobody brought that out like Rachel Berry. Still, there was really no getting out of this now that they had been noticed. They headed over to join the two of them in the booth.

"Oh my god Quinn, it is so good to see you, it's been like forever! How have you been? I can't believe you transferred to NYU without even telling me! Hey Britt!" Rachel basically sounded like she was screaming to Quinn as she attempted to give her a hug. Quinn returned it as lackluster as possible and laughed on the inside at the fact that it only took one sentence for her to realize that Rachel hadn't changed a bit.

_Annoying as ever_ Quinn mouthed towards Brittany who frowned in response.

"I'm doing okay, how about you Rachel? Are you still rooming with Kurt? Apparently you didn't annoy him to death, but I can't imagine he's handling another year of you."

Okay, so much for not acting like she's still in high school. Defense mechanisms aren't exactly easy to unlearn. The look on Rachel's face made her immediately feel like a bitch. Here was a girl hoping that Quinn might actually move past her petty feelings, but Quinn had gone and confirmed her worst fears in all of 20 seconds.

"Quinn," Brittany pleaded.

"It's okay Brittany; I'm used to it, even if it has been over a year. Kurt can handle me just fine actually."

"Let me just add that while Rachel may have some habits that are not exactly at the top of my roommate etiquette chart, her cleanliness and support make her a fabulous roommate. By the way Quinn, I must say, you look simply stunning!" Kurt interjected lightening the atmosphere Quinn had done such a great job of stirring up.

"Told you so," Brittany added.

Quinn felt embarrassed. She was revisiting high school with two people who had clearly matured and gotten past it. She knew she should apologize, but old habits die hard.

"Thanks, I guess," was the best she could come up with.

"Rachel says she simply does not have enough alcohol in her system to dance, but Brittany, I figure you're game, I want to get my groove on!" Kurt said, simply bounding with enthusiasm.

Brittany glanced at Rachel who gave her a look that said she would be fine. She nodded and grabbed Kurt's hand leaving Rachel alone with Quinn.

Quinn was already unhappy that she wasn't consulted about this development and now she was going to be forced to deal with Rachel's rambling alone.

"So Quinn, are you and Brittany together? I mean I saw you guys kiss across the room and if I do say so myself, she is exactly what you need to lighten you up! I mean…"

"Whoa Rachel, calm down, no we are not together!" Quinn interrupted before Rachel could possibly go on. Leave it to Rachel to be blunt and come out and ask something like that. She was quickly regretting asking Brittany to pretend to be her girlfriend.

"Quinn," Rachel said exasperated, "you don't have to hide things like that. I have two gay dads as I'm sure you know and I live with Kurt."

"Rachel geez, if you would just let me freaking talk! I asked Brittany to pretend to be my girlfriend so guys wouldn't hit on me tonight, which she apparently took to mean she should kiss me in the middle of the bar. So no Rachel, we are not together. No I am not ashamed to admit it because there is nothing to admit. Now can we please just attempt to have a civil conversation." Quinn looked at Brittany on the dance floor with daggers in her eyes. She couldn't believe the girl had tricked her into spending a night with Rachel Berry.

"You're right Quinn, of course, it was foolish of me to jump to conclusions. Let's just talk like normal people who haven't talked in a long time. So why did you transfer to NYU?"

"Money," Quinn said bluntly, attempting to end the topic. She knew the best way though was to get Rachel talking.

"How is NYADA treating you?" she quickly added.

"Oh my god! NYADA is amazing, like it's everything I dreamed and more. Unfortunately, freshman can't have the lead in the school musicals, so I just had supporting roles last year. But, Quinn, guess what?"

"What?" Quinn indulged Rachel. She knew asking Rachel about NYADA was an invitation to hear verbose rambling of the egotistical nature. Then again, Rachel loved to talk about herself and Quinn would rather endure that pain than deal with a barrage of questions.

"I just heard today that I got the lead in the fall semester musical! They said I'm the first sophomore to be the lead in school history. Given, the school is only about 20 years old, but still, isn't that amazing?"

"Congrats Rachel," she said, trying to sound as excited as she could manage. Luckily Brittany and Kurt returned to the booth at that point. It was at this point that the devil appeared on Quinn's shoulder with an incredibly terrible idea to get back at Brittany for dragging her here.

"So Rachel, has Brittany found it in her heart to inform you what happened between her and Santana because I would love for someone to tell me?"

Rachel's hand moved fast as it quickly slapped Quinn's wrist.

"Shhh Quinn, we don't talk about that."

"Bathroom," Brittany's timid voice leaked out before quickly bolting from the booth.

"Good going Quinn. When are you going to grow up? I would go after her, but I'm really not allowed in the girl's bathroom," Kurt said glaring strongly at Quinn. She reflected on how that never really seemed to stop him in high school, but remembered that they were in public and this was slightly different situation.

Quinn looked ashamed. This night had quickly gone from her feeling embarrassed to feeling like complete shit. She was so out of her element hanging out with these people and she knew she wasn't coping well.

"I'll go," Rachel chimed in.

Quinn grabbed her wrist at the last moment. "No, I need to go." Rachel seemed to understand and quickly sat back in the booth as Quinn got up and headed off to the bathroom. Luckily it was early, so it wasn't too crowded yet.

Quinn noticed some soft sobbing coming from the handicapped stall and pushed her way through the unlocked door. "Britt, I don't even know where to start. I am so sorry." Brittany was huddled in the corner trying to conceal the tears streaming down her face. Honestly Quinn had never truly understood the dynamic between Santana and Brittany, but she knew how much their friendship and then relationship had meant to the blonde. She couldn't imagine what it meant to lose both of those things at the same time.

"It's okay. I guess it's what I get for not telling you what happened."

"What? No Britt, this is my fault. You shouldn't be so hard on yourself. Tell me what I can do to make it up to you." At least with Brittany, Quinn felt she could apologize. It was an ability she had never really acquired around Rachel.

"Maybe I could kiss you again?" Brittany asked.

Quinn chuckled. "I don't know if that's such a good idea. I might like it too much," she admitted in a moment of honesty. "How about a hug instead?" she countered.

"I'd like that."

The two friends embraced squeezing each other tight. After a minute Quinn finally managed to pull free of Brittany. "Can we go home?" Quinn asked. This night had confirmed Quinn's worst fears that she was not even remotely ready for public interaction yet.

"Okay, let's say goodbye." Quinn was surprised Britt had agreed with her so easily. Either the girl had a keener insight than she thought or Quinn's foolish question had made Brittany want to get out of there just as much.

Quinn stood next to Brittany as she said heartfelt goodbyes to Rachel and Kurt. She even apologized like it was somehow her fault. Quinn couldn't possibly imagine how this night could have gone any worse and she had no one to blame but herself. Quinn quickly added her goodbyes then the two girls headed out.

They quickly reached Quinn's metro stop and Brittany got off just to say goodbye. Quinn reflected on how good a friend she had almost squandered.

"You know, whenever you're ready to talk, I'm here for you." It certainly sounded like the reassuring statement a concerned friend would say. The fact was that Quinn didn't have the patience implied by it. She was dying to know what had happened between the couple. They were really her only two friends and not knowing what happened in their lives really hurt. She knew her actions hadn't earned their trust, but that didn't change how she felt.

"I don't know Quinn, you stopped being there for so long. I might be ready when you're ready to tell me why that was." Brittany responded looking thoughtful.

"I…you're right. I owe you an explanation. Eventually, I promise Britt, just be patient, please?" Quinn was aware she was fighting a losing battle. She could only go so long masking her own problems while attempting to remain friends with Brittany and Santana. Still, it was going to take time, she was not ready to form the words necessary for explanation.

"I'm not going anywhere," was all she said. They said their goodbyes and Quinn headed back to campus.

She got into bed and put her iPod on shuffle before plugging the headphones into her ears. She knew it was going to be hard falling asleep tonight. It couldn't be a coincidence that "Why Georgia" by John Mayer was the first song that came up. She couldn't help but get the feeling that she wasn't living it right at all.

* * *

A/N: In case you are wondering there really is a Brittany Hall at NYU, it was too perfect to pass up.


	3. Chapter 3

Thanks for the reviews. They are always appreciated and motivating!

* * *

Quinn woke the next morning feeling incredibly groggy. It was Mallory's typing on the computer that had finally stirred her to consciousness. She started to feel a little ticked off when she looked at the clock and realized it was almost noon. It had taken her a long time to fall asleep and she estimated that she maybe got 5 hours of sleep despite the lateness of the hour.

She got up and grabbed her shower caddy and towel. She knew a shower was the only way she was really going to wake-up this morning. Quinn was thankful that it was Sunday and the whole day was hers' with her homework well out of the way.

It was after she had returned to her room and gotten changed that Mallory finally broke their silence.

"Soooo…how was your night Quinn?" Mallory drew out. She figured the girl would press this issue given her not so subtle reaction to hearing Quinn was going out last night.

"Not so great. Yours?"

"Hmm…I don't think that is going to satisfy me for your first night out. I almost fell off my chair when you agreed with your friend to go out. My night was fun. I ate way too much food, then spent the rest of the night dancing it off."

Quinn chuckled at Mallory's explanation of her night. She did a double take of her roommate. "No offense, but I think you need to eat a little too much food now and then." The girl certainly wasn't anorexic or anything, but she was pretty thin. It was one of those things that looked right at the same time that it didn't.

"Look who's talking. I eat a lot, I just have a high metabolism and volleyball helps burn the calories. Anyway, stop trying to change the subject, I want details!"

Quinn found it remarkable at how this girl could go from subdued to excited in a heartbeat. It was like you never knew what you were going to get when she started talking. "I never ask you for details about your nights." Quinn said, attempting to get out of this even though she knew it was fruitless. She honestly wouldn't mind sharing if the night hadn't gone so horribly wrong. Talking about it felt almost as embarrassing as living through it in the first place.

"You're welcome to. Besides, me going out isn't a once in a generation moment." Mallory had a giant smirk on her face.

"Very funny. Fine, my night was horrible…glad you asked? I got hit on by some random guy when it was the last thing I wanted, so I asked Brittany to pretend to be my girlfriend. This apparently meant that she should kiss me. Then I found out we were meeting up with two people from high school and I was horrible to them, just like I was all throughout high school. I followed that up by being terrible to Brittany and then we left after only being there for like an hour because I was so fucking embarrassed." Quinn wasn't a particularly big fan of dropping the f-bomb, but she was so exasperated just from talking about her night that she could hardly motivate herself to care.

Not surprisingly, silence followed her explanation of her night. Mallory looked kind of dumb founded as she processed everything Quinn had just laid on the table. So Quinn wasn't exactly the world's greatest story teller, but this was a story she had no desire to tell in the first place.

"You and Brittany made out?" Mallory asked finally breaking the silence. She seemed to regain her composure rather quickly and was displaying what Quinn could only finger as a weird kind of confidence.

"Out of all the things to take out of that, that's the one you dwell on? She kissed me once, so made out is kind of exaggerating," Quinn said trying to kill the topic. She wasn't exactly mortified about the kiss, but she still didn't feel comfortable talking about it. It was one of those things that become more and more awkward the more it was talked about.

"But why did she kiss you in the first place?" Mallory pressed. Quinn noticed her roommate had a sudden excited glow around her face. For some reason this topic seemed to really interest the brunette and Quinn couldn't say she was exactly on board with the topic. Honestly, she was wondering why Mallory would really care at all.

Quinn huffed as she prepared to attempt to explain Brittany to her roommate. "Well Brittany is very easily confused and when you add her bi-sexuality into it, me asking her to pretend to be my girlfriend…well I didn't think it through I guess." As Quinn was talking Mallory had shifted and moved over to Quinn's bed. It felt odd to Quinn, like this wasn't exactly the conversation that should warrant this kind of movement.

"I see….well how was it?"

Quinn was starting to get curious as to why Mallory was so concerned about her kiss with Brittany. She wondered if the girl was just trying to embarrass her or maybe she was just asking to torture Quinn.

"Why do you keep asking me about this? Why not ask about the fact that I'm a horrible person to people I haven't even seen in a year?" Quinn's voice raised as she was feeling extremely frustrated. Out of all the things that happened last night, what was the big deal about her friend giving her one kiss? Most of all she was yearning for a conversation about something familiar. She was used to being thought of as a bitch, it was much more in her comfort zone than kissing other girls even if she did feel ashamed about it.

"….just curious I guess," Mallory stuttered. She then craned her neck and quickly connected lips with Quinn before the blonde could react.

Quinn's mind raced in the moment. She was being kissed…again…by a girl…again. The kiss was a little harsher and rough compared to Brittany's. Once Quinn got over the initial shock she began to respond to Mallory's aggressiveness. Mallory then put her hand on the back of Quinn's neck and began to deepen the kiss. Quinn then allowed her lips to part ever so slightly and Mallory took no time to let her tongue dart into the opening.

Shortly after that Mallory broke away. "Not bad," she squeaked. She quickly got up from the bed and grabbed her backpack. Quinn just sat stunned on the edge of her seat as she watched Mallory walk out of the room spouting something about the library.

"What the hell?" Quinn breathed to no one in particular since Mallory had already shut the door behind her.

Her mind was already a mess and now her roommate had to go and make it even worse. She had gone 19 and a half years of her life without ever kissing a girl and now in a matter of 24 hours she had kissed two different girls.

It was a completely new and foreign experience to her and she was having trouble processing her feelings on it. It felt good, but at the same time…she knew it was wrong. None of it made any sense.

After letting a million thoughts tumble through her head for a few minutes Quinn came to one conclusion: she needed to talk someone. Unfortunately she could only think of one person who fit the bill and that meant the rest of her Sunday was going to be torture.

She grabbed her phone and dialed the number.

"It's about time you called me Q. You finally learn you can't live without me?" Santana said.

"Santana, can you come over?" Quinn quickly asked trying to make Santana understand that she needed her.

"Come on girl, let's go out!" she heard in reply, clearly ignoring the pleading in Quinn's voice.

"It's 1pm on a Sunday." It was hard to sum up the patience she sometimes needed to deal with Santana. Now was so not the time.

"And your point being?" Santana probed. After a few seconds of silence she added, "Fine, I won't pass up an opportunity to see the oh so busy Quinn Fabray. I'll be over as soon as I can."

"Thanks Santana," Quinn added hoping Santana would understand this wasn't just a social call.

"Quinn…is everything okay?" Santana asked, her voice changing to the softer version only her close friends ever got to hear. One that didn't really come out of the woodwork until late Senior year.

"Let's just save it for when you're here…I'll see you soon."

The last thing Quinn wanted was to hash this out over the phone. She quickly ended the call before Santana could say anything else. Sure, seeing Santana's facial expressions was going to make the experience pure hell, but Quinn couldn't possibly feel any worse than she did right now. It reminded her of junior and senior year in high school, when she was so confused and just searching for her place in the world. Quinn hated that feeling and had finally felt it subside when she got accepted to Yale, but it had slowly crept back in over the last six months. This was a new Quinn though, and she would be damned if she would let it defeat her again. This time, it was time to ask for some help to get her through.

####

After freaking out for an hour Quinn was finally buzzed back to reality quite literally. She quickly pressed the button that would open the front door for Santana. Luckily, unlike Brittany, Santana could figure out all the steps needed to get to Quinn's room without her having to get up. A couple minutes later Quinn heard a loud knock on her door.

"Come in," Quinn called out and Santana came striding into the room. "Took you long enough," Quinn breathed out.

"Quinn, this is New York, not Lima, you're not just a 5 minute drive away anymore. 'Thanks Santana for dropping everything and getting your ass over here as fast as possible' would have been more appropriate." Santana had a classic glare on her face as she eyed Quinn.

"I'm sorry Santana, I'm just going out of my mind here. I needed you…I mean I need you," Quinn apologized.

"Well I'm here and as an added bonus I will try to keep my snide bullshit to an absolute minimum starting…now," Santana responded and took a seat next to Quinn on the bed. Quinn realized she probably looked like a mess; she hadn't applied any make-up and was shaking all over.

"Well spit it out already." Santana pressed after a minute of silence while lightly pressing a shoulder into Quinn. It was as gentle of a needling as she was capable.

"I don't even know where to start…well let's start with this, please promise you won't be angry?" Quinn asked pleadingly. Sure Brittany and Santana weren't together anymore, but that didn't stop San from being incredibly possessive. She just wanted to get through this without being slapped or even worse: hated.

"I love when conversations start like that…how can I possibly guarantee that? You clearly need to get this off your chest either way… so why don't you just get it over with and I'll try my darndest."

"Okay, well last night Brittany kissed me and before you go crazy, it was like because I asked her to pretend to be my girlfriend to avoid getting hit on. I mean I had no idea she would do that when I asked…so like, I'm sorry."

"Jesus Christ Q, you are fucking awful at telling stories. When you tell someone shit like that you START with the explanation. You say Brittany kissed you and I start getting angry despite myself and THEN you tell me a reasonable excuse…we all know that she's incredibly friendly. If you asked me to do that I would be hanging on you sure, but I sure as shit wouldn't kiss you. Britt on the other hand…there's gotta be more to it than that for you to be freaking out like this." Quinn's fear quickly subsided as Santana deemed her excuse reasonable.

"San, I'm sorry, I'm not all together here so bear with me. Well I told my roommate about it and she ends up kissing me too and then she just leaves the room!" Quinn was wavering between feeling better about being able to talk about this and just feeling embarrassed to death. She knew she must be bright red. She could see Santana was focused though even if her eyes did go a little wide at finding out she had been kissed by two different girls in the last two days. At least she wasn't the only one who found that crazy.

Santana quickly scanned over to the other desk in the room and eyed the picture frames sitting on it. She walked over to them. "Is this your roommate?" she asked. "Damn," she said as Quinn nodded. "Well aren't you quite the player, attracting all the hotties. Quinn I know you're all like Miss Christian and whatnot, but this is college and people like to have a little fun. I know it's weird for you, but you'll get over it. When was like the last time you had sex with a guy?" She headed back to the bed.

"I haven't really done anything with a guy since Puck. That kind of thing will keep your legs closed." Quinn admitted. It was something she had felt rather proud of, but Santana had a way of making it feel pathetic.

"Shit girl, you didn't have sex with anyone at Yale?"

"Not really."

"What do you mean not really? You either did or you didn't."

"No," Quinn sighed. "Look Santana I didn't really call you over here to discuss my heterosexual sex life anyhow." Statistically speaking conversations with Santana had an extremely good chance of of bringing up the topic of sex, but that was the last thing Quinn needed right now.

"Well I'm still failing to see the issue here…enlighten me?" Santana said looking confused. Quinn could understand how someone in Santana's position might think it was not a big deal, but she was hoping the brunette would understand that this wasn't so easy to cope with for Quinn.

"I - well I'm…I actually enjoyed it," Quinn finally spit out.

"Enjoyed what exactly?" Santana pressed.

"The kisses!" Quinn screamed. "Two girls kissed me and I liked it…both times." She felt some of the pressure ease as she finally voiced it out loud. She chuckled a bit internally at her reverse Katy Perry song, the same one they had sung in Glee when Santana had finally begun to come to terms with her sexuality.

"Oh…." was all that escaped Santana lips. "Well what do you think that means?"

Quinn sighed at Santana's question. This was the reason she had called her over, she had no idea what it meant. Was it normal for a girl to enjoy kissing another girl? Quinn had always heard it said that girls were much better kissers. Maybe that was why she enjoyed it so much?

"That's what I asked you here for. You know what it feels like. I mean I haven't been attracted to a guy since I gave birth and I always figured that was why. I really don't know Santana, help me out here." Quinn pleaded.

"Well have you ever been attracted to a girl?" Santana asked.

"Yes." Quinn was thankful it only took one word to answer the question because it was always something she felt she should be ashamed of. She always explained it as being normal for girls to think other girls are attractive, but it didn't help explain her lack of attraction to guys.

"Besides me though. I mean I know I'm hot as shit and you can't help it. Have you been attracted to other girls?"

"Yes," Quinn responded while rolling her eyes at Santana's egotistical display.

"Okay Quinn, well let me just say this now: Brittany is fucking off-limits." Santana said while eyeing Quinn. She was daring her to challenge the statement.

"No, not Brittany, it was enjoyable kissing her, but I've never been attracted to her in that way. Besides, you know I would never do that to you." Quinn had to admit she became a little afraid of Santana when Brittany was involved. It was the truth though; she didn't really have any interest in the girl. She had to be honest with herself; she could never handle Brittany's stupidity as more than a friend. She knew that was mean, but she never really understood how Santana could deal with it.

She wasn't sure Santana would believe she wouldn't steal Brittany. After all, Quinn didn't have the greatest track record of cheating on and stealing boyfriends. Still, it was one thing when the parties involved were a giant oaf, trouty mouth or Rachel Berry. It was different when it was Santana. They had been friends for too long to throw that away over a girl. Even if she had been interested in Brittany, even with the two of them broken up, she honestly would never do that to Santana. Truthfully, she valued her physical health as well as the friendship.

"Why? What's wrong with Brittany?" questioned Santana.

"Jesus Santana!" Quinn said wanting this conversation to be over.

"I'm just playing with you Q."

"This is why I hesitated to call you. Everything is a joke to you." Quinn was at the end of her rope. Santana should know personally how hard this was for her.

"You're right…I'm sorry. Serious face is back on. Is there anything else you wanted to say?"

"Well in addition to all that, I saw Rachel and Kurt. I know you are mildly friendly with them, but I saw them and I just became the Cheerio bitch again. I couldn't even hold a civil conversation with Rachel. I don't know what's wrong with me." Quinn really wanted to change, she just didn't know how. Could Santana even help her with that? Santana still had the same sarcastic dry humor from high school, but she definitely wasn't the same person.

"I still take digs at Berry all the time." Santana admitted. Quinn knew it was true, but she also got the impression they weren't nearly at the same level as high school. There was a strong difference between occasionally poking fun at a friend and the way Quinn acted the previous night.

"Yeah, but that's you. Somehow you get away with all that. Even so, I don't even give her a chance. I just want to stop and be a nicer person San." Quinn felt a few tears slipping down her cheeks. She felt drained and helpless.

"But we're both bitches Quinn. It's why we get along with each other so well."

"Well…maybe you're right, but maybe that isn't making me happy anymore." Quinn knew she wasn't the nicest person, but she dealt well with most people. It was a different situation when it came to dealing with Rachel. It was something she was struggling to understand, like she was somehow programmed to act like she hated Rachel because she certainly didn't actually hate the girl.

"Come here," Santana said and quickly grabbed Quinn into a tight hug as she moved forward. "Look, I know you don't want to hear this, but what you need is someone who doesn't know you and is trained to help you, not a sophomore majoring in Psychology. I wish I could be more help and I'm always here to talk, but maybe you need some professional help?"

"I just don't know what I need anymore." It was true, she was drowning. She still had plenty of branches to grab on to, but Quinn had no idea which one would keep her afloat.

"Well maybe that can help you figure that out." Santana said pleading with the girl.

Quinn understood why Santana was making the suggestion and she kind of agreed with her, but at the same time there was just something about therapy that didn't mesh with Quinn. She had heard it suggested many times before around the pregnancy and her parents throwing her out, but she had always coped in her own way. She had always been raised believing that going to therapy made you weak, it was admitting defeat. Maybe it was time to throw in the towel.

"Yeah, maybe." Quinn breathed out. "Maybe I could talk to a priest or something?" she suggested weakly. Even as she said it, she seemed to acknowledge that it wasn't the answer.

"Quinn you went to church every Sunday for 18 years of your life. Do you honestly think some bible thumper is going to help you with this? You better not be one of those self-hating people who try to _cure_ themselves. Please promise me Quinn, if you really think you might be bi or gay…don't even think about doing that." Quinn honestly thought Santana was underestimating priests to some degree, but now was not the time to get into that argument.

"You really think I'm like that? Did I ever trying anything like that with you when you came out?" Quinn was honestly a little disappointed in Santana. Sure, she was a member of the God Squad, but she had never done anything but support Santana with her issues.

"Well usually people are hardest on themselves."

"I promise, I wouldn't do that. I just don't know…how do you go through so much of your life and still have no idea where you belong or how to find the person you want to be?"

"You just need some help. I'm gonna be here to offer that, but I just don't know if I'll be enough." Quinn saw the sad look on Santana's face. The girl wanted to help so bad, but Quinn knew she didn't have all the answers.

Santana held Quinn in her arms for what felt like forever as the girl just let the tears out. She felt like she had been holding them in for years.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Thanks again for the reviews. I never meant to insinuate in my original note that Brittany/Santana were together as of the beginning of this story, when I said they are involved I just meant in the story. Unfortunately it's going to be a little bit before significant Rachel interaction, but she'll get back into the story soon enough.

* * *

After Santana left, Quinn spent the rest of the day working ahead on homework in a hopeless attempt to take her mind off her problems. She finally fell asleep later that night with the mindset that tomorrow was the beginning of a new day. If she couldn't work through these issues then she wasn't the girl she thought she was. She did agree with Santana though: she needed help.

Quinn woke up at 7 the next day and began getting ready for her 8:30 class. She grabbed a banana on the way out and headed off to her Inquiries into Teaching and Learning class. She hadn't even told anyone what she was majoring in these days. Sure no one had asked yet, but she wasn't quite sure they would believe that Quinn Fabray wanted to be a high school teacher.

She wasn't sure she believed it herself, but when she had settled on the idea, something about it just felt right.

Quinn settled herself in a desk towards the back of the small classroom. It was one of the things she loved about this year in college: now that she had decided on education all of her courses were small seminars. This one was just a group of 25 students and she kind of enjoyed getting to be involved in class again. The only downside was that she was technically a year behind.

She noticed a guy sit down in the desk next to her. He had been sitting in the same seat next to her since the class had started. Quinn had to admit he was handsome with his dark brown hair pressed down and spiked out lightly to the sides. Still, they hadn't even introduced themselves. It was one of those things you saw on TV that never seemed to happen, the kids sitting next to each other in-class becoming quick friends. She had barely talked to anyone in her classes at Yale and nothing was too new here at NYU.

"Okay class, let's get started. Today we're going to take a dive into the deep end into one of the toughest things about being a teacher: classroom management. Before we get into it, I want to see what you guys think. So grab a partner, introduce yourselves, and talk about how you think you might handle an unruly student in your class. Take about 5 minutes."

After their professor had finished Quinn's eyes connected with a pair of blue one's that belonged to the boy she had noticed earlier. They reached an unspoken agreement that they would partner up and quickly turned their desks towards each other.

"I'm Damien," he said introducing himself.

"Quinn. So what do you think?" Quinn noticed he had pretty blue eyes and was an attractive guy. Still, it felt more like Quinn was supposed to think he was handsome rather than actually felt that way.

"Well I like to get control of a classroom. I would certainly give a warning, but after that I like to hand out detentions or send them to the dean depending on the school, you know? I enjoyed learning and couldn't stand kids who disrupted that." The boy sounded confident as he told Quinn his ideas. "What about you?"

While he definitely wasn't a Sue Sylvester who would probably just insult or yell at any students who annoyed her, this was not at all the type of teacher Quinn saw herself being. If Will Schuester taught her anything it was that getting to know your students was important. She wanted to be like him….just less self-involved and more aware. She certainly planned to actually know the subject she was teaching too.

"I don't think I would handle it that way," she stated strongly. "If I couldn't get them to stop I'd send them in the hall and then talk with them after class. I know from personal experience what a difference it makes to the student when the teacher makes an effort. You can't throw a kid away just because they act up…there's always a reason for it."

Damien looked like he hadn't expected Quinn's answer to differ much from his own and was thinking it over. "Wow. I guess I never thought about it that way. So you had some behavior issues in high school personally? I don't mean to pry, I'm just trying to learn."

"Not really, I mean I got away with some stuff my students certainly won't. I had some serious issues in my life though. I saw some teachers help me in incredible ways and some were horrible. If it wasn't for one in particular, I don't know if I even would have made it through high school." Sure, it was probably the kids in Glee who helped her through it more than Mr. Schue, but she realizes that would have never happened without him.

"Alright, eyes back to the front. Let's talk about what we learned." The teacher refocused them before Damien could respond to what he had just heard from Quinn.

The rest of the class went fairly normal as they discussed what each group had said and came up with some guidelines for classroom management. They ended up making a list and tabling the discussion for next week when class ended.

"Hey, wait up!"

Quinn heard a voice and turned around to see Damien jogging up to her.

"Quinn, I hope I didn't offend you or anything?" he asked.

"No, you didn't offend me?" Quinn answered confused.

"It's just you seem to have yourself figured out. I guess you kind of made me feel lost."

Quinn chuckled, if only he knew. "Maybe when it comes to this. I think our own educational experiences shape us as teachers much more than any of these classes ever will."

"You're probably right, but you already taught me a few things. I was thinking maybe we could get coffee sometime and talk more about it? I'd like to hear more of your perspective," Damien asked.

Quinn was trying to decipher whether this guy was really interested in discussing educational methods or was trying ask her out. She certainly didn't want to lead him on as she had no interest in any relationship right now. Either way, he seemed nice enough and she could use some friends. "Sure…I'm really busy this week though. Can we figure out a time next class?"

"Of course. Have a good one Quinn." Honestly, she was pretty busy and she really wanted to evaluate how she thought about getting coffee with Damien. Putting it off a week would allow her a chance to think it over. Still, she fully expected to agree to a time next week.

"Yeah, you too."

Quinn was proud of the way she handled that. It didn't even make her nervous as most interactions with guys had a habit of doing.

Quinn only had one other class on Monday's, Writing the Essay, which went fine. Afterwards it was time to get back to her life.

###

How ironic that the NYU Counseling Center should be on Broadway. It was a big fat sign that maybe this was the place to be. At least it was nowhere near any of the shows. Quinn took the elevator up to the 4th floor and found the right office. As she walked in she saw a kind looking student that looked a couple years older than her sitting behind the counter.

"Hi, I was hoping to make an appointment for a counseling session." Quinn suddenly felt weak and the urge to run out of the building struck her hard. However, the only thing that felt more embarrassing than being here was running away.

"Are you a student at NYU?" the girl asked.

"Yeah."

"Can I please see your student ID?" Quinn quickly fished her ID out of her purse and handed it over to the girl.

The girl responded by typing a few things into the computer. "Okay Quinn, what kind of counseling were you looking for?"

Quinn was confused. What kind of counseling? Were there even multiple types? She suddenly felt like she wasn't prepared to be here at all.

The girl seemed to notice the look on Quinn's face. "What I mean is would you like individual short-term counseling or we have group counseling. There are also self-improvement classes where you work on certain aspects of your personality. Obviously I don't know what you need help with….If you need help deciding there are some pamphlets over there." She pointed to some holders on the right side of the counter.

Quinn quickly glanced through the short-term counseling and self-improvement class pamphlets. She found it hard to imagine talking through her problems as being anything remotely short-term, but it was the only thing that didn't require her to face a group of people, so it was clearly the obvious choice.

"I think I'd like to schedule an individual session," she said with all the fortitude she could muster. There was something about being at a counseling center that just zapped the confidence right out of you. She really hoped that was something that would return as she continued coming here.

"Okay, let's schedule you a session. Can you let me know which of these categories you might need help with so I can assign an appropriate counselor. I promise everything that happens in this office is strictly confidential." The girl passed her a list that she quickly scanned down.

"I guess it's a combination of friendship problems and…uh…identity problems," Quinn managed to squeak out the last part of the sentence.

"By identity you mean that related to GLBT issues correct?" The girl eyed Quinn as she asked.

"Yes," Quinn replied blushing deep red. She knew this girl probably couldn't care less. She probably dealt with 10 guys and girls just like Quinn every day. Still, that didn't make it any easier to tell a complete stranger.

"Is there anything else? Any other issues?" the girl pressed.

"I don't know…I guess. These are the most pressing though…if that makes any sense?" Quinn knew this was a mistake. She was already being asked things she didn't want to answer. She certainly didn't feel like delivering a laundry list of problems because there were some she still couldn't bring herself to even think about.

"Perfectly. Are you having any suicidal thoughts?" the girl asked.

Quinn couldn't believe what she just heard. The girl had just asked plain as day whether she was suicidal. What on earth was up with that?

"WHAT? NO! Absolutely not!" Quinn yelled.

"Quinn, please calm down. It's just something I'm required to ask. I'm not asking for any reason other than that, I promise you. I'm sorry it upset you." The girl's eyes looked apologetic.

Quinn knew she was making a scene and luckily there was no one else in the front of the office at the time. "Oh okay. I didn't know," Quinn decided to let it go, but she definitely felt the question could have been asked in a more appropriate way. "Well when will my appointment be?"

"It's okay. I just have one more question. Would you be more comfortable talking with a male or female counselor?"

"Female, definitely." Quinn didn't even have to think twice about that question. She could never really remember a time in her life that she has been particularly comfortable around men, especially when her feelings are involved. She wonders whether it has something to do with the issues she is currently facing, but ultimately decides the responsibility lies more with her father than anything else.

"Okay then, I will put you down for 3pm on Thursday with Dr. Taylor. That is the earliest opening I have unfortunately. I trust you'll be okay until then, but here is an emergency number just in-case." She slid a card across to Quinn.

Quinn was frustrated that she would have to wait until Thursday to talk out her issues. Still, it might take her a few days to muster up the courage. She grabbed the card and muttered a thank you before leaving the office.

Three days….she wasn't sure how she was going to make it that long. Quinn's mind fell on an earlier suggestion. She needed to get a job. She knew she needed something to keep her mind occupied and a job search would be the perfect way to do that.

###

Quinn decided to take a long walk down Broadway to clear her head. It was as she was in the SoHo area that her eyes settled on a now hiring sign. It was in the window of a small clothing boutique and Quinn was suddenly inspired. If there was one thing she felt comfortable with it was her fashion sense. As a struggling college student Quinn couldn't imagine anything better than getting a discount on clothes.

The store seemed to be desperate for help. The manager asked if she was available for a quick interview right the spot. After a few questions the manager told Quinn to fill out an application and as long as there were no issues, she would be hired. For the first time in weeks she felt confident. There was something about being wanted that just made you feel better about yourself.

Quinn filled out the application and left it with the manager before heading back to her dorm. Soon after sitting down, Mallory came back to the room. The two had not spoken since their kiss the previous day and Quinn had no desire to bring it up. However, she didn't want to push away her roommate over it.

"Hey Mal, how was your day?" Quinn liked taking the initiative, it was time to stop being timid. Despite the complete awkwardness Mallory had brought on the other day, she still felt a strong desire to become close friends with the girl.

Mallory seemed a bit surprised Quinn was talking to her after the previous day. Quinn figured they both felt equally uncomfortable about the situation. "Pretty good, classes went well and then I had practice. I'm kind of exhausted though."

"Volleyball right? Do you play any other sports?" Quinn asked.

"Right. I play some tennis now and again, but volleyball's the only college level sport I play. What about you? You look fairly athletic," Mallory asked.

"I was a cheerleader in high school, but nothing outside of that." Mallory burst out laughing after she finished telling her. Quinn was baffled by the reaction. She assumed the girl was implying that it wasn't a sport, she'd loved see Mallory argue that one with Sue Sylvester. "Let me guess, not a sport? Try being on a national championship cheerleading team and then I'll take your opinion seriously."

"Haha, no it's not that. You are just like the perfect stereotype. Beautiful blonde cheerleader, I should have seen it coming."

Quinn was so not having it. Between everything that was going on in her life, she did not need someone she barely knew assuming things. She might look that way on the outside, but that was not her on the inside. Yeah, so she dated the jock, but she also was in Glee Club, rocked a perfect 4.0 GPA and went to Yale. How many cheerleaders did that?

"Well I also got pregnant and had a kid at 16…so maybe not so stereotypical." Quinn knew it was an inappropriate time to drop that bomb, but she was sick of Mallory acting like she knew her. And unlike so many other things, it was something she no longer felt ashamed of; Beth had seen to that.

"Quinn…I'm sorry I didn't mean…I'm sorry, I don't really know how to respond to that." Mallory looked defeated. Quinn felt kind of guilt for just throwing that it out there, but it was a habit to get defensive when people ticked her off.

"It's alright, I just don't want you to think you know me just because I'm some blonde cheerleader. I figured you should know. I enjoy talking to you Mal, I hope that we can be friends, but people making assumptions….I don't deal well with that to say the least."

"Cool, yeah I'm sorry 'bout that. I don't have anything like that to drop on you, I guess I'm fairly boring compared to you. Hug it out?"

Quinn chuckled. This girl was something else sometimes. She got up and placed her arms around Mallory's waist and gave her a strong embrace. After a few seconds Quinn's phone rang and the two broke apart.

"Hey Santana, what's up?" Quinn asked as she answered the phone.

"Just wanted to make sure you're doing alright Q. After yesterday it took a lot of control to wait 'til now to call you. Hope you appreciate that."

Typical Santana, Quinn thought, making everything about herself in some small way.

"Thanks San. I'm doing a little better. Made an appointment at the counseling center and may have gotten a job at clothing boutique too. Been a busy day, but I think I'm gonna be okay. I appreciate it though."

"Awesome, you are so hooking me up with clothes. I also wanted to schedule you before you're booked at the library or with you damn bed again."

"What does that even mean?" Quinn asked slightly confused about the statement assuming it was a typical attempt at an insult by Santana.

"It means we are hanging out this week and I'd prefer to not be forced to drag you from your room."

"Oh….can we keep it low key at least?" Quinn wasn't sure she could deal with going out to a bar or a party after this past weekend. In fact she wasn't above faking a phone disconnection if Santana proposed they go out and party.

"Yeah, that's what I wanted anyway. Maybe dinner and some drinks….well drinks for me at least, I'm going to need them. I think it's time I told you about me and Britt."

Quinn dropped her phone in surprise. She knew she'd hear about Santana and Brittany eventually, she just never thought it would come from Santana. Sure Santana opened up a little senior year about Britt and coming out, but she was basically forced into that situation. Nobody was forcing her to tell Quinn this.

"QUINN ARE YOU THERE? WHAT THE FUCK?" Quinn heard through the phone even though it was still on the ground. She quickly scrambled and retrieved it before placing it back to her ear.

"Yeah San…sorry. I just never thought I'd be hearing about this from you." Anything resembling a conversation about feelings always seemed to be initiated by Quinn. Which was really saying something since Quinn knew she was far from open about her feelings.

"Well don't fucking rub it in. Let's just leave it here for now and we'll talk about it this weekend okay?"

"Okay, talk to you later Santana."

"Later Q."

After ending that call, Quinn decided to spend the rest of the night working ahead on some homework. She knew she would likely have a job soon and was also starting to have plans over the weekend. When you tossed in therapy she was about to be a very busy girl and she figured she should get stuff out of the way while she could. Quinn remembered when just a couple of days ago she figured NYU would be a break compared to Yale. Boy, how things change.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Thanks again for the reviews! I promise Rachel will come back into the story next Chapter, but until then, more Santana.

* * *

The next two days did not go easy for Quinn. As much as she dreaded talking about her issues with a psychologist, she just wanted it to get here already. It was hard knowing that it was coming up and just waiting on the edge like this was close to unbearable. Classes on Tuesday went okay, but on Wednesday they just developed into a blur and Quinn felt like she just sat there absent-mindedly taking notes. Quinn couldn't even imagine how she looked, but Mallory gave her a clue when she finally raised the subject Wednesday night.

"Quinn, is everything okay? You look like your about to pass out and you just keep gawking at your homework."

Quinn's barely registered what Mallory asked as she looked over the girl who clearly had a worried expression on her face.

"Not really. I'm seeing someone for help tomorrow. Like professionally and I just am going crazy waiting for it. I guess that shows how badly I need it, right?" She felt bad laying this all on her roommate who she hadn't even known a month, but she was going crazy not having anyone to talk to it about. She knew she could call Santana, but there was nothing new to say on that front and she wanted to give San some space until the weekend.

"Is this…about the baby?" Mallory asked. Quinn noticed the girl looked nervous about bringing the topic up.

"Not really," Quinn almost whispered in an unconvincing voice. She hadn't even thought about Beth in terms of the therapy session, but now she wondered if that was another topic that needed discussing. She had never really talked about it with anyone besides Puck. Even though Shelby had moved away after Quinn had screwed up her chances, she still let her stay in touch with Beth. After what happened, Quinn realized how important her baby was in her life. Once Beth had turned two she had begun talking to her on the phone once every month. While the conversations were pretty much one sided at first, they had quickly developed as Beth learned more and more words. Even when she stopped talking to Brittany, she never gave up on her daughter. It was the rare thing that Quinn was actually proud of these days.

"You never really told me what happened with that. Does your family take care of her or did you give her away?"

"It's a crazy story, but I gave her to someone who could give her a better life. We knew the person, so it was making the best of a bad situation." If there was one thing Quinn had never really regretted it was choosing Shelby to take care of Beth. Sure there were times Quinn wondered if she should have kept the girl, but if she was going to give her up, Shelby was the only person who felt right.

"Do you keep in touch?" Mallory asked. Quinn suddenly felt she had been pretty fortunate when it came to getting a roommate this time. The kissing incident aside, Mallory was a cool girl and seemed genuinely interested in being a good friend.

"Yeah, every month. The therapy isn't really about that, not in the general sense. It's about other things I need help with. I hope I'll be able to talk with you about them one day, but I couldn't handle it back-to-back days." Honestly Quinn didn't feel comfortable telling Mallory right now at all. Even though telling a stranger was going to be difficult, at least she wouldn't have to see that person every day. She felt foolish that she acted like these problems were that big a deal.

"It's cool Quinn. I hope everything works out."

"Me too. Thanks though for asking, I do appreciate it."

Quinn tried to refocus on homework when her phone rang. It was a number she didn't recognize, but it was a local area code so she answered it anyway.

"Hello?"

"Hi, is this Quinn Fabray?"

"May I ask whose calling?" Quinn answered. She didn't recognize the voice and she really didn't feel like dealing with some telemarketer.

"This is Beverly, I'm the owner of Dresses on 6th."

"Oh! Is this about my application?" Quinn was suddenly hit by a wave of excitement. She felt she had this job in the bag and was really looking forward to getting started. It was nice to have some area where she felt confident.

"Yes I would like to offer you a position here as a sales associate. You would start at $9 an hour. You can let me know now or if you need to think about it, you can…."

"Yes, I accept the job!" Quinn cut her off. She had a job, the first job of her life really. She was incredibly excited.

"Well that's good to hear. Would you like to come in tomorrow afternoon to fill out the paperwork?" Beverly asked her.

Quinn thought about coming in after classes and therapy, but decided that might not be a good idea since she had no idea how it was going to go.

"Unfortunately tomorrow doesn't really work for me. How about Friday instead? Like any time after noon is fine."

"Perfect, just ask for me or Patty, she's the other manager. Look forward to seeing you then Quinn."

"Thank you so much!"

Quinn hung up the phone feeling some relief for the first time in a while. At least someone saw something in her.

####

Finally it was 2:55 on Thursday and Quinn was standing in front of the campus health center. The problem was that she was pacing back and forth. She knew she needed this, but she also couldn't bring herself to walk inside. She decided to take out her phone and look for some support. As much as she would love to call Brittany, she had no desire to have to explain the whole situation. She decided to call Santana even though she knew her friend was in class right now. When it went to voicemail Quinn sighed in disappointment. Santana really had changed, in high school she would never ignore her phone.

Originally Quinn thought a few days would be perfect to process everything and get herself ready for therapy. All it really did was give her three days to freak out. She might have been able to manage if it had happened right away, but the long wait just gave her all the time she needed to scare herself away from it. The colossal task of fixing all her problems by talking to someone suddenly felt like way too much.

Quinn continued pacing back and forth for another few minutes. She took another look at the clock on her phone and it read 3:02. That was the final nail….she couldn't do this. She needed it, but she couldn't walk in that front door. She knew it was rude and went against all the manners her upbringing had taught her but she decided to walk away.

When she finally returned to her dorm room she threw herself on her bed and started crying into her pillow. She already felt pathetic, but now she was running away from her problems. She quickly realized that finding this new Quinn she wanted to be was going to be a lot harder than she thought.

She finally noticed she had a text message.

_ Hey Q saw you called. Hope you made it to therapy okay. Let me know everything is okay!_

She couldn't even bring herself to type a response. Letting herself down was hard enough, she didn't want to let down Santana too. It was unavoidable, but it could at least wait until the weekend.

####

The rest of the week went fairly well considering. Class on Friday was fine and she followed that up by going to fill out the paperwork at her new job. Everyone there seemed incredibly nice and she found herself really looking forward to getting started. It was her first job after all and it was time to begin building her resume. They agreed to have her work a training shift the following Tuesday night.

Before she knew it Saturday night had rolled around. Quinn decided to keep it casual since they were just meeting up for dinner. She put on an olive green sweater that sort of matched her eyes and a pair of dark jeans. She stuck with ballet flats to make sure she would be comfortable.

They decided to meet at the restaurant at 6pm. They were going to Lupa's, which was apparently some Italian place that Santana claimed was amazing. The girl was nice enough to pick a place in Greenwich Village even though Columbia was nowhere near there. For Quinn it didn't even require her to take the metro and she began the short walk over to the place.

Santana was waiting for her outside and the two embraced before heading in and grabbing a table. They began really talking after place their orders.

"So Q, you never texted me back. Not cool. How did therapy go?" Santana asked. Quinn noticed the worried look on Santana's face. She knew the answer was going to be a let down.

"I didn't go," Quinn answered bluntly. She already felt like hiding because she knew how disappointed Santana would be.

"Oh…why the fuck not?" Santana didn't really sound angry, it sounded more like she was in disbelief at what Quinn had just told her. Quinn wondered what was so hard to believe about her failing at something else.

"I was going to…I was standing right outside trying to go in. Then I called you and you couldn't be there when I needed you and I freaked and I left." Quinn knew it was unfair to blame Santana before she even began. She was the weak one here and it was that weakness that required some kind of scapegoat.

"Don't you dare fucking put this on me Quinn. You knew damn well I was in the middle of class. If you ever take a psychology class you might learn that one of the first steps to getting better is to stop blaming others for your mistakes."

Quinn noticed that after Santana's brief fit of anger over being blamed she was looking at Quinn with pity in her eyes.

"I-I'm sorry….please stop looking at me like that." Quinn couldn't take it when people looked at her like that. Half the looks she got while pregnant said 'look at that poor girl'. She supposed it was better than the other half that said in no uncertain terms that she was trash. Still, it was a look she was sick of a long time ago. The last she wanted to be seen as was the pitiful girl who just couldn't do anything right.

"Like what?"

"You think I'm pathetic….I can see it in your eyes….and you're right." Quinn figured it might be time to start accepting what she was.

"Quinn, stop. You made a stupid decision, but you're not pathetic. I was proud of you for trying to get help. Even if you kind of suck at it."

"Trying seems like the apt word there." She had tried, but she had most certainly failed.

"I'll go with you next time….I'll miss class if I have to, but you're going to get there."

Quinn appreciated the gesture, but it still made her feel so weak.

"Why do you care so much?" Quinn squeaked out.

"You're my girl…I always gots your back." Quinn was left in silence wondering what she had possibly done to deserve Brittany and Santana. They weren't always the easiest people to deal with, but when push came to shove they were the best friends she could ask for.

Quinn starred in silence as she managed to hold in the tears that were threatening to break free.

Santana finally broke the quiet. "Okay….I think I'm ready to talk about it. I'm sure this will make you feel slightly less pathetic," Santana finally said. Quinn slid her hand across the table and squeezed Santana's in a reassuring gesture. As she went to pull back though, Santana grabbed her hand and held it. Quinn softened into the grip.

"Do you mind if I ask why this is such a big secret to begin with? I'm kind of confused why neither of you have told me why you broke up," Quinn asked. She figured the answer might be in the telling, but just in case she wanted to ask ahead of time before it was too late.

Santana sighed, "Honestly, I've been too embarrassed to tell you and I think Brittany…well she's probably just protecting me. You're going to be angry with me. I know you will, but I finally decided it was better that you hear it from me."

The confession made Quinn wonder what Santana had managed to pull off now. While their original get together had been delayed because Brittany was seeing someone else, she just didn't see Britt being the one to make a mistake that ended the relationship. She hated to think this way of her friend, but Santana was the smaller person of the pair.

"Okay, it'll be okay. I promise, I'm not going anywhere." Quinn was sure at this point that while she might be disappointed in Santana that it wasn't going to break their friendship. They had been through too much at this point for that too happen. Not to mention Quinn really didn't have that option, she only had two friends these days to begin with.

"When I got to Columbia, I started feeling insecure about myself just like in high school. I knew deep down they wouldn't care, but I still told hardly anyone that I was gay. I kept Britt at a distance. I would almost always visit her at Julliard or we'd meet somewhere else. I look back at what I was doing and I have no idea why I did it. Everyone I'm friends with at Columbia…they know now and I realize how fucking stupid I was." Santana stopped her story and her eyes fell to the table. Quinn could tell she was pretty embarrassed and ashamed about the whole thing.

"Santana, look at me." Santana's head lifted up and her eyes met Quinn's again. "It's okay. I mean I understand, look at me, it isn't easy. I can barely even talk about it." Barely might have been an understatement. Quinn couldn't manage to go to therapy and she couldn't even say any of those words out loud.

"Quinn, I know what you're trying to do, but don't try to explain my shit away. I did this once already in high school, remember? And you didn't know, I've known, I came out in high school because if I didn't I was going to lose her. I remember how disappointed she was when I tried to hide who I was. Then I went and did the same god damn thing again. Well she finally figured out what was going on and confronted me about it. She kept asking me why she never comes to my place, never sees Columbia." Santana paused and seemed scared to continue. Quinn waited patiently knowing her friend wasn't one to stop a thing once she started.

"Well it all became too much and I…I ended up cheating on her. There, now you know. I told myself at the time that I was drunk, but the truth is I knew exactly what I was doing."

"So she broke up with you?" Quinn asked. She couldn't believe Santana could be so stupid. She would do anything to find the connection the two girls had.

Santana laughed at the question.

"Of course not. I went to her, I told her everything, how I was ashamed, how I cheated on her. She asked if I liked the person I did it with. I told her it was just some stupid guy, so of course not. And you know what she said?"

"That it didn't matter?" Somehow Brittany not being mad about it doesn't surprise Quinn the least. Brittany was smarter than she appeared and she had to know Santana might go and do something stupid like this.

"Yes! I couldn't take it. She didn't even care as long as I still loved her. I did…I still do, but I couldn't live with what I did to her. She must be a masochist to want to be with me after everything. I did the only thing I could think of. I broke up with her and told her she deserved better than me." Santana dropped her head again and started crying lightly.

Quinn got up and moved to the girl's side of the booth and wrapped her up tightly. "Geez Santana you are such an idiot. I'm angry at you, but not because you cheated, I'd be the biggest hypocrite if I hated you for that even though I don't understand it. Truthfully I never loved either of the guys I cheated on the way you love Brittany." Quinn certainly wasn't proud of the fact that she had cheated on two boyfriends, yet she couldn't help but feel that there was a difference between what she did and what Santana had done. Didn't love make all the difference in the world? Suddenly she wasn't so sure.

"So what are you angry about?" Santana squeaked out while crying into Quinn's shoulder.

"You hurt Brittany and she was willing to forgive all your stupidity. Then instead of taking the logical road and working things out, you went a broke the girl's heart completely. That's why I'm mad, you're selfish Santana. I've been kept in the dark for 6 months because you made a mistake that you're too much of a coward to own up to."

Quinn could feel Santana shaking and then she was shoved away. Quinn stumbled and then returned to her side of the booth. It felt incredibly awkward and she hoped no one in the restaurant was looking at them. She quickly realized Santana was angry.

"What the hell Quinn…you're one to talk about being a coward."

"I guess it takes one to know one, right?" She knew Santana was right of course, Quinn had always been a little bit of a coward, but that didn't mean she couldn't call Santana out on it too.

"I'm trying to own up to it now."

"Not with me you fool, with Brittany. You're too scared to accept that all she wants is you no matter how much you try to screw it up. Instead of trying to make it up to her you're running away behind some crappy excuse that somehow makes sense in your mind."

"I'm not trying to be mean Santana, I'm just trying to help you realize how stupid you're being," Quinn added after a brief silence.

"I just don't think I'll ever be able to forgive myself," Santana finally admitted.

"Well I guess you gotta ask yourself if your misplaced sense of pride is worth ruining two people's happiness over," Quinn stated bluntly. Sure maybe they weren't meant to be together, but if that were the case, why was being apart making them so miserable? She thought back to when Finn broke up with her. It hurt, but it was more about what Finn represented then the actual joy she got out of being with him. Santana and Brittany had something she had never experienced and Santana was throwing it away.

"Do you want to drop it?" Quinn asked after they were both quiet for a while.

"Yes….please…let's just enjoy dinner," Santana said.

Even though the food was good, Quinn couldn't say that she particularly enjoyed the rest of their dinner together. They hardly uttered another word to each other the rest of the night and said soft goodbyes. Quinn knew they would be okay, but it certainly wasn't a good night for their friendship.

####

Quinn was on her way back from dinner. If there was one thing she had learned, it was not to let your own stupidity interfere with being happy. Even though she was never in love with Finn, she couldn't help but realize that when they were together, before the pregnancy of course, were some of the happiest times in her life. She couldn't wait to experience just how happy being in love with someone could make her.

When she returned from dinner around 8:30 Mallory was still getting ready to go out for the night.

"Hey Quinn, how was your dinner date?" Mallory asked.

"Not a date. It was…fierce? I don't know, have you ever found out something you've been dying to know only to wish you had never been told?" Even though her curiosity was finally appeased, the answer to that burning question was filled with unmeasurable disappointment. She couldn't believe how stubborn Santana was being, let alone how stupid she had been in the first place.

"Definitely, Santa isn't real! But yeah…I get what you mean. Do you want to talk about it?" Quinn couldn't help but laugh at the joke. It reminded her of Brittany and their Christmas celebrations in high school.

"No, I just want to forget about it. Fat chance though. Where are you going tonight?"

"Some apartment part across campus. Did you want to come…some alcohol might help you forget?" Quinn noticed Mallory seemed to be holding in some excitement that Quinn might actually agree to go out.

"Thanks for the offer, but I don't drink anyway." Quinn figured she might as well tell someone. She instantly felt bad as Mal looked disappointment at the rejection.

"Wow, how did I get the lamest roommate ever. You're lucky you're cool and I like you." Mallory yawned.

Quinn didn't know if it was the kiss, the dinner with Santana or the fact that Mallory had just said she liked her, but she suddenly felt brave.

"Mal…"

"Quinn?"

"Would you ever want to go on a date?" she asked. She was thankful Mallory was blocking the mirror because she was sure her skin was anything but white right now.

"Huh? A date where? With who? Are you setting me up?" Quinn felt her stomach lurch at Mallory's incomprehension of what she was asking. She knew this wasn't going to end up good, but she had come too far to turn back now.

"I mean with me…would you ever want to go out with me?"

"Oh…ohhhh! Quinn, I'm straight." Mallory was blushing and clearly feeling awkward.

"But you kissed me!" Quinn was so confused. She knew this was probably the time to back down and go home with her tail between her legs, but she pressed the issue nonetheless. Why would you kiss someone if you didn't like them? Was this some kind of trick? You just didn't do that where she came from.

"Quinn, I didn't think you were gay! You were so defensive about Brittany kissing you!" Mallory was on the defensive.

"I never said I was…never mind. This was a horrible idea." The world horrible didn't even being to describe how Quinn suddenly felt about the whole situation. What on earth was she thinking?

"Quinn, I'm so sorry. I was just experimenting. I only like you as a friend."

After a brief silence Mallory continued. "I'm gonna go because I can see you're angry and I don't want to get in a fight. We'll talk more later I promise cause I want to be friends, but just know I'm sorry if I led you into thinking I was into you. Good night Quinn." And with that Mallory left the room and Quinn collapsed into a heap on her bed.

Quinn didn't really blame her for just bolting; it was only going to get worse if she stayed. Quinn grabbed her pillow and began weeping into it for the second time this week. She had finally put herself out there, for the first time to a girl and she felt like a fool. The worst part was there was no one to talk to it about. She was too mad at Santana to take that road and she didn't have the patience to deal with Brittany. The most depressing thing was that Quinn was beginning to feel like she deserved it.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Always appreciate the reviews. For those of you commenting on the lack of Rachel, that is going to change slightly, but I warn you this is Quinn's story and while Rachel will be a significant part in that she isn't going to be around all the time.

I apologize for taking a while to get this chapter up, but life has been busy. I am posting two chapters to make up for this in some small way.

* * *

Quinn woke up the next morning hoping it was all a bad dream. She looked over at her roommate's bed and noticed it was empty and still made from the previous day. It quickly reminded her what had happened and that Mallory had felt the need to stay somewhere else. It was probably just to avoid anything awkward, but Quinn couldn't help the creeping feeling that Mallory might want to avoid her in the future.

Quinn quickly took a shower and got dressed for the day. In an effort to cheer herself up, Quinn decided to do some online shopping. After a few minute she found the perfect thing to buy. While help was still necessary, there was no reason she couldn't get started on a little self-therapy. She knew deep down it was selfish, but she also knew what this would mean. It was a first step and one she needed to take. So what, if cheering herself up was an added bonus?

Quinn scrolled through her contacts and hoped she hadn't changed her number. After all, it hadn't been used since high school.

Quinn took a deep breath and then pressed the number to dial it.

"Hello?" squeaked out the extremely surprised voice.

"Hi Rachel, it's Quinn."

"Why are you calling me? I thought for sure Santana had stolen your phone and was playing a joke on me."

Quinn couldn't help but feel pressured to find the right thing to say. She figured if she could just get Rachel to meet with her everything would work out, but it seemed like Rachel was through being nice to Quinn. Who could blame her after all this time?

"I was hoping we could meet up? Maybe grab some coffee or lunch? If you're not too busy today…" Quinn asked.

"You want to meet up…with me? You do know you called Rachel Berry right? Why on earth….explain yourself Fabray." Rachel had clearly gathered some of her courage after the initial shock.

"I thought maybe we could….start being friends." Why did it sound so pathetic when she said it like that? She had never asked someone to consider being her friend before, it made her sound so needy. The truth of the matter was that she did need it. She wanted so badly to prove to herself that she had changed and becoming friends with Rachel not only seemed like a good idea, but also the perfect way to show she wasn't the same old Quinn.

"You want to be friends? Why? What do you need from me suddenly? Quinn I hadn't seen you in over a year and I don't think I need to refresh your memory about last Saturday."

Quinn knew she had screwed up the last time she met up with Rachel, but she just needed to convince the girl to give her another chance. Did she even have the right to ask that after messing up so many times?

"Rachel…please," Quinn pleaded. "Can we just meet and I promise if you don't want to talk afterwards I won't bother you again." She just needed Rachel to say yes. If she said yes everything would be fine or so Quinn believed.

"Okay. Meet me at the bar we went to last Saturday, there is a coffee shop just down the street. I'll be there in 30 minutes."

Before Quinn could even utter a thank you the line went dead. Still, she had gotten what she wanted: a face-to-face with Rachel. If that conversation made anything clear it was that this was Quinn's last chance. She grabbed the two pages from her printer and folded them, stuffing them into an envelope as she grabbed her purse and headed out the door.

####

Quinn had been waiting for a few minutes when she finally spied Rachel walking up the street. As they approached each other Quinn felt the overwhelming urge to give the girl a hug, but knew Rachel wouldn't appreciate it.

"Follow me," Rachel simply said as she finally caught up to Quinn.

They entered a local coffee shop and quickly grabbed a table. "Can I get you something?" Quinn offered.

"I'm perfectly capable of getting my own coffee Quinn." Quinn could tell Rachel was annoyed that she even had to be here. Honestly, she couldn't blame her, Quinn had given Rachel every reason to stay away from her. Now, finally Quinn realized she wanted Rachel in her life and the brunette seemed utterly confused and…angry. She didn't know how to deal with this Rachel because even with everything Quinn did in high school they had never gotten to this point. Rachel was always cordial and friendly even when Quinn didn't deserve it.

Quinn ordered a simple black coffee. Rachel ordered the same, but added some sugar to her cup. The two of them sat back down at the table and Rachel leveled a glare at Quinn that asked the girl to explain herself.

"I know this is out of the blue….I know I don't deserve it, but I want to be your friend Rachel. I'm sorry about last week, I just got into old habits and….there's no excuse."

"Quinn, if there is one thing I have realized about you, it's that those habits always seem to creep up. I found out last week that despite my misplaced hope otherwise, nothing about you has changed."

"I have changed Rachel, I swear. Wait…I got you something…to show you. I know it's going to seem like I'm trying to buy your friendship…but it's just a start, I want to earn it, but I want you to know I mean it." She wasn't sure she was making sense, but she knew the gift would. She removed the envelope from her bag and pushed it across the table to Rachel. "Open it."

When she saw Rachel's face light up after opening it, Quinn really wished she had her camera phone ready. This definitely wasn't about winning and losing, but nonetheless, Quinn knew she had won then and there. She was going to get her second chance…it was just a matter of not screwing it up.

"These are for me? For us to go?" Rachel squeaked out still clearly overwhelmed.

"You can take whoever you'd like…I'm sure Kurt would love to go." Here was the only potential hiccup in her plan…she knew she couldn't force Rachel to take her, that would be wrong. She gave her the choice, even gave her a better choice, and prayed that Rachel picked her anyway.

"He would, it would be so much fun! Quinn I really can't believe you did this." Quinn felt her heart falter. She suddenly wished she didn't give her a choice.

"But…" Rachel let out and Quinn found herself waiting earnestly for the next words. "I think I'd rather go with you."

"Rachel….I'd love to." Quinn felt the smile spread across her face. It wasn't about winning or losing….still, this sure felt like winning.

After that they finished their drinks then said their quick goodbyes. Rachel apparently had to rehearse lines the rest of the day. The girl also insisted paying Quinn back, but after Quinn's adamant refusal, she finally agreed to the alternative of letting Rachel treat her to dinner. It was amazing that after everything she couldn't wait to spend next Saturday with Rachel Berry. The next week was going to be torture, but Quinn was used to it.

####

Mallory was not in the room again on Sunday night. Quinn was beginning to worry. She knew the girl was probably fine, but she pretended that was the reason for texting her.

_ Hey, Mal…wanted to make sure you are okay since you haven't been sleeping here. _

She wanted to add something about not being mad or needing to talk, but her fingers wouldn't listen and she pressed send after giving up. Quinn really did not want to be one of those girls who had their roommates move out because they couldn't get along or were weird.

After class on Monday Damien again asked if Quinn was available to get coffee. She really wanted to turn him down again because everything was just so complicated. Still, she wanted to make an effort, make new friends, what chance would she have with Rachel if she couldn't manage with people she had just met. In the end they agreed to meet up on Saturday afternoon for coffee.

When she returned to her dorm room she found Mallory gathering some books and fiddling through her bag.

"Just getting stuff for the library," Mallory snapped out before putting her backpack on and leaving the room. It seemed to be this girl's habit for avoiding confrontation and Quinn was sick of dealing with it. She ran into the hallway after her and yelled.

"MALLORY, don't you dare!" Even in her weakness her commanding head cheerleader voice could still come out when she needed it.

"Quinn, you're obviously still mad…let's just…forget about it for a few days."

"Unless you want to have this out in the hall for the whole floor to hear, you better get back in our room NOW."

It seemed to work even though Mallory looked resigned as she walked back towards the room. Quinn gave her death glare to a head that had peaked out of another room to see the commotion. The person quickly disappeared back into their room.

"Okay, now tell me what the hell is going on. Are you not okay living with someone who is…" Quinn couldn't manage to finish her sentence.

"NO!" Mallory blurted out clearly understanding where Quinn was headed. "That is totally not the issue here. I thought it would be fine, but it's just weird to be rooming with someone that's interested in you…I'm trying to work through it."

"Remember that you kissed me…not the other way around." Quinn couldn't help but feel that if anything this was Mallory's fault. Without that kiss, she never would have asked her out. She knew it was a mistake in retrospect, but that didn't mean it completely her fault.

"I get that. That's totally on me, but it was just for fun. That's why I left and didn't bring it up. I'm sorry I led you on, but still…we're college roommates, you don't ask your roommate out, it's just asking for trouble."

"So kissing your roommate is cool then?" Quinn understood where she was coming from and suddenly felt so stupid for not analyzing the consequences better before she acted in the first place. Still, Mallory had been the one to start it all in the first place. She needed Mallory to understand that there was no infatuation here.

"You're right Quinn, of course it was stupid, we've both made some poor decisions."

"Look Mal…you're right, I was foolish. But, I need you to understand I'm working through things and you kissed me and…..this is going to sound bad…" Quinn stopped.

Mallory looked at her confused and just waiting for her to go on. When Quinn realized her roommate wasn't going to say anything she had no option but to continue.

"I was using you to try to figure out my own issues…..you kissed me and you're attractive and nice and I wasn't thinking clearly. But I'm not like…in love with you. I barely know you. So while this might be awkward for a while…it shouldn't keep us from rooming together or anything like that."

She hoped her point had gotten through. The last thing she needed was to be abandoned and living alone. Even if things were awkward it was nice just having a presence in her room. She was certainly lonely enough as it was.

"Okay," was all Mallory said.

"Okay? Not very much to go on there," Quinn responded trying to draw more of an explanation.

"I think I understand….I'm not planning on moving rooms or anything. It just might be weird for a little between us, but I want to help you…just not like that."

"Really?" Quinn was incredibly relieved. She wanted to give the girl a hug, but knew that would be crossing the line.

"Yeah, so….I really do need to go to the library."

Quinn chuckled and realized she was blocking the door. She quickly shuffled out of the way and sat on her bed.

"Later Quinn," Mallory said as she exited the room.

Maybe, just maybe thing weren't going to be so hard.


	7. Chapter 7

Suddenly things were almost back to normal. Well normal for Quinn, which was quite a different barometer than the average person. She still had ditched on therapy, needed to make amends with Rachel, and had a whole plethora of other problems that were gnawing at the back of her mind. Yet, things were now good with Mallory and she had an amazing opportunity to fix the one thing she could never forgive herself for: the way she had treated Rachel Berry. Sure, it was probably the 10th time Rachel had given her the chance, but Quinn was determined to succeed where so many other times she had failed. It was something about being a more mature college girl that gave her the confidence where usually there was none.

Things were beginning to feel right with her roommate after the awkwardness the two had both helped create. Mallory had finally spent the night in the room again Monday night and the two were exchanging casual banter. Quinn had to be honest, she wanted more. Not the stupid date she had foolishly asked for, but she felt a strong friendship brewing and she just hoped the events of the past couple weeks hadn't ruined it. Because despite her weird desire to randomly experiment by kissing Quinn, Mallory seemed like a good person. Quinn needed a whole lot more of that in her life and even though she was the most important piece, Rachel was just the start.

Quinn was lifted out of her thoughts by her phone vibrating on her desk in the study room. She recognized the area code but not the number and figured it might be someone at her new job because she didn't know the number by heart yet. She quickly scooped up her phone and headed into the hallway to take the call.

"Hello?" she answered.

"Hi, is this Quinn Fabray?" the tentative voice on the line asked. Quinn didn't recognize the voice at all and figured someone from work would just ask for her by first name only.

"Yes."

"Hello Quinn, this is Dr. Emily Taylor, you had an appointment with me last Thursday that you didn't show up for and I just wanted to make sure everything was okay and see if you wanted to reschedule?"

Quinn is suddenly racked by a whole range of feelings. Her whole body starts to go numb and she suddenly feels nervous and put on the spot. Her desire to hang up the phone is overwhelmed by her guilt at not showing up to her therapy session in the first place. The last she needs is to feel worse about that and hanging up would accomplish exactly that.

Finally she begins to contemplate the questions she was just asked and it finally gets her to calm down slightly. Is she okay? _I made an appointment to therapy and then didn't show up, and you're supposed to be a doctor?_ Quinn decides to hold that thought back and instead focuses on the idea of rescheduling her appointment. Suddenly she realizes what this means and stops panicking. She wanted to schedule another session and this call just makes it easier. Plus, with Santana already agreeing to help her, she feels confident about showing up the next time.

"Quinn?" Clearly all her thinking was taking time and she still hasn't said anything. The doctor shows the first signs of getting impatient and Quinn hopes, but highly doubts that won't be a problem in therapy. Her feelings have a way of making others get exasperated.

"Sorry, and I'm also sorry about missing the last appointment. I would really like to schedule another one." The first step in fixing her guilt is apologizing. The second is actually showing up to the next session.

"Okay, well then I will keep you on the books for the same time this Thursday then. Can I count on you to be there?"

"Perfect, yes ma'am I will be there." It's funny that Santana gives her all the confidence in the world. If she were on her own it probably wouldn't happen, but knowing that her friend has her back, she'll be there, she'd bet every last dollar on it.

"Good to hear, I look forward to meeting you."

After they say their goodbyes, Quinn texts Santana:

_Therapy session, Thursday 3pm, I need you to get me there._

Quinn's sudden doubt that Santana might not be there for her because of her harsh words at dinner are quickly erased when she receives a text back 30 seconds later.

_I told you girl, I always gots your back. Pick you up at 2._

Really, what did she do to deserve a friend like this?

####

Late Tuesday night Quinn finds herself hoping on the metro and off to her first shift of work. Other than a brief babysitting stint during the craziness that was sophomore year of high school, this is her first job. She finds herself surprisingly nervous considering the job seems right up her alley. Selling dresses should come easy to a girl who seemingly wears nothing else.

Quinn first meets the owner Beverly who is a short middle-aged woman with a pixie cut. For someone who owns a clothing store that sells some beautiful dresses, Beverly's fashion sense isn't impressing Quinn. The woman is wearing a somewhat dumpy cardigan and jeans. She keeps the thought to herself, but it's certainly not what she was expected.

Beverly quickly pairs her up with Nina, another college aged girl who fits more into what Quinn expected of the employees. Nina is sporting her blonde hair in a bob and is wearing a white cardigan belted around a pretty pink dress. It's an outfit much more to Quinn's liking and she figures the girl probably bought the dress here.

"So Quinn, before we get started, why don't you tell me a bit about yourself?" Nina asks.

It's a question Quinn truly hates. She tries not to get a bad opinion of Nina off the bat since the girl seems nice and has good fashion sense, but Quinn can't stand being asked such ridiculous open-ended questions about her life. "Umm…well there's not much to tell really." Quinn figures that will show the girl, give me a stupid question and I'll give you a stupid answer.

"Let me give you a friendly tip Quinn, sales is as much about the product as it is about creating a connection with your customer. You have to be friendly and know how to answer questions as well as start conversations. So, let's start by trying that with me, pretend I'm your friend if that makes it easier."

Quinn is instantly struck by how badly her plan backfired. So, her first few minutes of work and she has already failed test numero uno.

"Right, sorry, I'm not a big fan of talking about myself, but talking, yeah I can totally do that," Quinn says in an attempt to recover. It's also a weak attempt at boosting her own confidence, she isn't quite sure she believes it.

Nina smiles at her and Quinn finds herself thinking that the girl is quite pretty. "That's fine, but how else are we going to get to know each other Quinn? Just answer some easy questions, are you in school? How old are you? Where are you from? You know the basics, I'm not looking for your biggest dreams or greatest fears here."

Of course, the basics, Quinn can keep it basic. She wishes she had just answered the question in the first place. "Well I'm 19, I go to NYU, from Ohio though." She decides she should add a little more to maybe try to start making a good impression. "I decided to work here because I really love dresses as you can tell." _Come on Quinn, you can do better than this._ "I must say I really love your dress also, where did you get it?"

"Well that's more like it. Complimenting customers fashion is always a good way to go, unless you actually think it's hideous. Though I guess if you are a good liar, it doesn't matter. You're not a good liar Quinn, are you?" Quinn silently pats herself on the back, but then has to consider being asked if she is a good liar. What an odd question. She might be good at holding back the truth, but saying lies out loud is a completely different thing.

"No, I don't think so."

"Good, then you really do like my dress! I got it here, but we don't carry it anymore, so I'm afraid you are out of luck. And now is the time when you express interest in your customer."

Okay, so Quinn has to admit this is honestly one of the weirdest experiences in her life and she can't say this is anything like she expected when she took the job. Still, she decides to play along and see where it takes her. "So are you in school as well?"

"How nice of you to ask, Quinn. I am actually in my last year at the New York Academy of the Dramatic Arts or NYADA for short."

Quinn can't hold in the laughter that even in this huge city, the world seems so small. "Really? Do you know Rachel Berry or Kurt Hummel?" She finally feels like she has some foothold in this conversation with Nina.

"RACHEL BERRY! How do you know Rachel Berry?" The outburst catches Quinn off guard and she is back to feeling awkward. Nina's entire mood changed with the mention of the girl she is attempting to finally befriend.

"We actually went to high school together and uhh…"

"Rachel Berry stole the lead in the NYADA musical from me. I am forced to be the understudy to the wretched girl. You better not be friends with her Quinn, that girl is pure evil."

Quinn is thankful she was cut off because she was about to stretch the truth and claim that she was sort of friends with Rachel. She instead is finding herself wondering what is so awful about Rachel that could ever make this girl hate her so much. Even in the hay days of torture, Quinn never _really_ hated Rachel. In the end, she decides to chalk it up to a penchant for drama that probably goes along with the school.

"Umm…no we're not really friends, we were kind of enemies for most of high school, she is kind of annoying." So this situation is totally not helping Quinn adjust to the potential friendship with Rachel. The last thing she needs is to be forced to pretend she hates Rachel at her job. She comes to the conclusion that the store is pretty small and business is rather slow, so the odds of her working with Nina on a consistent basis are probably low.

A smile slowly draws itself across Nina's face when Quinn calls Rachel annoying. "Oh my god, so annoying. Anyway, let's move on because talking about her will just get me in a bad mood, as you can probably tell."

"Yes, lets move onto the art of selling clothes." She feels incredibly awkward and just wants to move onto what she came her to do. She makes a mental note to ask Rachel about Nina because she really wants to know what this girls deal is.

The rest of the shift is mostly spent watching Nina sell to the various customers who enter the store. In the end Quinn decides this job should be pretty easy. The one thing she is worried about is telling the truth when customers honestly look terrible in the clothes they try on. She is definitely not one for sugar coating.

It doesn't take long for the end of her shift to roll around. Quinn's fear that being here will interrupt her attempting at befriending Rachel is once again reignited on her way out. Nina tells her how they must hang out sometime and talk about how awful Rachel Berry is. In the end, Quinn decides to cross that bridge when she comes to it. She already feels awful about letting Nina bash Rachel without standing up to her. Quinn is almost positive Rachel got the lead because she is the most talented person she's ever met because short of sending a girl to a crack house, she has never known Rachel to be a 'wretched' person. She spends the walk home trying to solve the puzzle that is Nina and Rachel and finds herself extremely anxious to ask Rachel about it.

####

Quinn returned from class on Wednesday feeling slightly overwhelmed. Between work, Rachel, therapy and the two papers she's had hoisted upon her this week she is going to be a busy girl. The nice thing is that besides working with Nina and therapy, she's mostly looking forward to everything else. Some people would probably call her weird for enjoying writing papers, but there's something to be said in convincing others that you are right. Quinn has a certain odd appreciation for school work and reading.

As much as she is looking forward to her Saturday with Rachel, Quinn can't help but feel extremely apprehensive. Despite the amount of chances Rachel has already given her, everything in her gut tells her this is the last opportunity to earn this friendship. It wasn't until a few days ago that Quinn finally realized just how badly she wants this. Quinn chalks it up to the guilt she feels for everything she did to Rachel in high school.

However, when she thinks about it, in the hours of the night as she tries to fall asleep, Quinn can't help but be reminded that if she really wanted to serve Rachel's best interests, she might just leave her alone. Nothing about her interactions with Rachel have been particularly positive. Even though she is dying to change that, she doesn't really believe in herself.

Quinn is outlining one of her papers when her phone rings. The screen lights up and reads an incoming call from Rachel Berry. Quinn suddenly feels like a bundle of nerves. It was so much easier when she didn't want anything from Rachel. She never felt like she had anything to lose, it's a feeling that scares her.

"Hello," Quinn says as she answers the phone.

"Hi, Quinn, it's Rachel, I wanted confirm your attendance for our plans this Saturday and finalize what we will be doing."

Quinn can't help but laugh lightly into the phone. Rachel is without doubt a little crazy, but for some reason Quinn finds she can get on board with this now. She thinks it has something to do with a combination of growing up and Rachel toning it down slightly over the years. Still, a Rachel Berry that isn't a little bit crazy isn't Rachel Berry at all.

"Of course you did. You know we could have just texted." Quinn can't help taking a little attack at the fact that Rachel refuses to send text messages. She still finds it ridiculous.

"Quinn, not only is texting extremely informal, but I believe you are well aware that I refuse to do so anymore and I am sure you know why." Rachel sounds somewhat annoyed, probably because she knows Quinn is just needling her.

"I am certainly aware Rachel, but I still find it ridiculous considering I was the one who almost died and my fingers still maintain the ability to type and press the send button." Okay, so that whole being nice thing is going to take some work.

"Yes Quinn, you almost died. Having that on my conscience is quite enough thank you very much. Now if we can please return to the issue at hand, did you have any input as far as our plans on Saturday?"

Quinn has already decided to let Rachel plan the night. "Well, the show is at 8, but aside from that I figured you could pick dinner."

"Perfect, I had just the place in mind. I will make myself present at your dorm room at 3:30."

She decides to breath deeply and ignore the fact that Rachel is coming over at what seems like an extraordinarily early time. She wonders if the girl has more things planned then dinner. The amount of time they will be spending together makes Quinn excited, but in the back of her mind is a worrying feeling that it's just more time to screw things up.

"That sounds great," she manages to reply calmly, "my dorm is at 55 East 10th Street, I'm in room 314."

"Great, well then if we do not have any further business, I must get back to vocal exercises."

"Wait!" Quinn finds herself nearly screaming.

"Yes?" Rachel sounds rather surprise at the outburst and Quinn can't blame her.

"Well, I was wondering, what is the deal with you and Nina?" She has been dying to ask this question since her shift ended. Even though it's only been a day, the issue has been distracting her way too much.

After a slight silence on the other end of the phone Rachel seems to recover. "I'm sorry Quinn, but it's been an extremely long day…who is Nina?"

It doesn't take long for Quinn to realize that the confusion is completely warranted. Rachel would have no idea that Quinn would know someone from NYADA besides Kurt and herself.

"She said she's your understudy for the musical. She doesn't seem to think too highly of you," Quinn explains putting it nicely.

"OH MY GOD! Quinn! How do you know her?"

Quinn is unsure whether her knowing Nina is that surprising or mentioning the girl's name has struck a nerve. "Well…I kind of work with her."

"Geez Quinn, you have the worst luck. That girl is such a drama queen that she makes me look calm and normal. She is incredibly talented, but I beat her out fair and square for the lead and she accused me of sleeping with the director! As if I would ever. She hardly gets along with anyone."

If there's one thing Quinn is sure of it's that Rachel won the role based on her talent.

"So basically, she's you in high school?"

"HEY!"

"Relax Rachel, I'm just kidding. She did seem slightly crazy. I was very curious what the deal was, so thanks for filling me in." Quinn finds herself slightly disappointed that there isn't a bigger reason behind Nina's attitude towards Rachel. She was very hopefully that maybe her new co-worker wasn't crazy, but Rachel has confirmed the worst.

"Sure thing Quinn. I will see you Saturday then?"

The way she asks it implies that is it indeed a question and Quinn is slightly disappointed that Rachel doesn't seem convinced this is actually happening. Quinn is reminded she still has a long way to go.

"Yeah, 3:30, I really can't wait." She tries to reassure Rachel that this is something she is looking forward to.

"Have a good night Quinn."

"You too Rachel."

Quinn sighs as she realizes all the things keeping her from Saturday already being here. Rachel should be the least of her concerns with a therapy session coming up on Thursday.


End file.
